Adios!

Well, this is my last night in Kansas before I head out to D.C. for staging.  I leave tomorrow, Wednesday June 8th at 2:45pm and arrive in D.C. at 9:00pm their time. Staging starts on Thursday at noon. Staging is basically a day long orientation about the Peace Corps and what to expect of your service. This is when I fill out all the last minute paperwork and meet all of the other volunteers. I hope to be able to lean on my fellow volunteers for support and guidance in the coming days, as we will all be going through the same emotional roller coaster. Then on Friday, it's off to Peru! Our flight leaves from Washington Reagan at 12:55pm and arrives in Peru at 9:05pm.

It's hard to believe that tomorrow is the day. When I began applying for the Peace Corps back in August I had no idea that less than a year later my dream would actually come true. If you've seen me in the last few days, I'm sure it's pretty obvious that I am constantly doubting my decision to join the Peace Corps and be so far away for such a long time. It's true- I am doubting it. What did I get myself into? Is this what I really want? Although these past couple weeks have been some of the most emotionally taxing of my life, I know that I am doing what I'm supposed to. God chose this path for me and I intend to follow it. Don't get me wrong, I've never been more scared about anything in my life. Take how I felt before leaving for Spain, and multiply it by about 1,000. I'm anxious, nervous, excited, scared... all at the same time.  I can hardly wait to meet the other Volunteers, be in Peru, meet my host family, and figure out just what it is that I'll be doing for the next 2 years. But, I have a lot of apprehensions, too:
Will my Spanish skills be enough?
Will my host family like me?
Will I make any friends?
Who will my support system be?
Are you guys going to forget about me?
Will I be too homesick to be a productive Volunteer?
Am I going to be able to function outside of my comfort zone?

I know my first few days and weeks in Peru are going to be incredibly difficult. There will be times when I hate it and I want to come home. There will be nights when I cry myself to sleep. And I will constantly be questioning my commitment. But I also know that there will be moments when I look up and realize that I'm in PERU and I'm fulfilling one of my dreams. It's then that I will realize that I am doing something that will actually make a difference in somebody's life, including my own. And those moments, no matter how few and far between, are the exact reason that I decided to join the Peace Corps in the first place. THAT is what is getting me through all these different emotions.

Enough of the emotional stuff. I'm going to include a list of everything that I packed, down to the last bobby pin. I found it useful to refer to other Volunteers' packing lists so I hope this will be beneficial to any other future Volunteers!
I am checking one rolling duffle and one rolling suitcase, with a combined weight of about 85lbs. I am carrying on my backpack.
Packing List:
Tennis shoes
TOMS shoes
Reefs flip flops
Tevas hiking sandals
Jeep closed toe walking/working shoes
Black flats
Red canvas slides
Slip-on slippers (of course they're slip on- they're slippers)
6 pairs of socks
15 pairs of undies
7 sports bras
2 underwire bras
5 tank tops
6 solid color everyday wear shirts
3 dressy blouses
4 sweaters
1 black cardigan
1 hoodie
1 fleece jacket
1 rain coat
2 light weight zip-up jackets
3 dresses
2 skirts
1 pair gauchos
1 one-piece swim suit
3 pairs of jeans
2 capri sweatpants
1 bermuda sweatpant
1 full-length sweatpant
5 athletic shorts
1 casual short
1 pair leggings
4 t-shirts
1 pair slacks
2 pairs boxers
2 pajama pants (one light weight, one flannel)
1 large sleeping shirt
1 small fleeve blanket
1 stuffed animal (PJ)
1 small bottle each of shampoo and conditioner
1 bottle face wash
2 bottles sunscreen
1 can bug spray
1 jar face moisturizer
1 bottle lotion
3 razors
10 things of floss
3 toothbrushes
1 tube mascara
1 eyeliner
1 eye shadow
1 liquid foundation
1 pressed powder
1 bronzer
Approximately 20 tubes chapstick (I'm addicted)
3 bottles nail polish and remover
Q-tips
Make-up remover towelettes
Hand wipes
3 month supply of prescription
2 headbands
Tons of hairties and bobby pins
4 bars soap
1 loofah
1 jar mousse for hair
2 jars Jif Reduced Fat Peanut Butter
Ibuprofen
General medicines
250 tampons (they're more expensive in Peru)
3 sticks deoderant
1 jar vaseline (in case I run out of chapstick) ha
Batteries
Wind-up flashlight
Ipod and small speakers
Nook and charger
Digital Camera and charger
Laptop and charger

I know that I overpacked, but I can't help it! Packing for 2 years is harder than one might think. Also, I'm sure I left something out.


Now that that's taken care of, I can successfully end this post. But before I do that let me say one last thing: I've realized that I care about too many people in my life for me to be able to say goodbye so many times. I've tried saying goodbye to everyone I love for the past few weeks, and I just don't like it. Goodbyes are too final, too sad. So, instead of goodbye, I'm saying "see ya later!" See ya in 27 months! I already miss each one of you and love you even more!

P.S. I definitely wouldn't be mad if you all sent me letters and emails ;)