¨Poco a Poco¨

Well, I had this really great blog post already typed up and ready to load onto the computer, but it won´t let me, so I´m going to start from scratch. It won´t be as detailed because my time is limited, but I´ll do my best.

This weekend was a little rough for me. I´m used to looking forward to the weekends, hanging out with friends, doing social activities, being lazy- but that doesn´t happen here in Peru. Weekends are almost worse than weekdays. Weekends are all Spanish, all the time. I enjoy my host family, but I just wanted to get out of the house and actually DO something that didn´t consist of playing Spanish Monopoly with 8 and 9 year olds. I guess I just miss having a life, but hey, that´s what I signed up for, right? I also miss being independent and living on my own. Here I have a set of rules, which includes not coming home later than 10 pm. 10? Seriously? It´s ridiculous. I know they´re just doing it because they´re worried about my safety, but come oooon. Anyway, I´ve been really missing the states and questioning just exactly what I´m doing here. What in the HECK did I sign myself up for? I feel so unprepared to become a Volunteer, and I don´t know if that´s what I want to be doing anymore. I dont know what I expected, but I guess this isn´t it. Nothing terrible has happened to make me question anything, I´ve just been a little down in the dumps lately. I´m sure I´ll spring out of it soon. I´ve been making new friends, and I do enjoy their company, but it´s hard not to miss my friends back home. I know I shouldn´t be comparing them, but when I already have the BEST friends in the whole world, how can I not?

OH! On top of a not-so-good weekend and so-so Monday, I witnessed a dog get run over by a car yesterday. Abslutely the most terrible and gut-wrenching thing I´ve ever experienced first-hand.

But, as they say, for every bad thing there is a good thing.  Saturday I ended up going to Chaclacayo with my host mother and my 2 sisters (5 and 9), and it was actually pretty okay. My host mom´s daughter´s husband is a tour guide and actually speaks a little English. So between his broken English and my Spanish, we got along swimmingly. He was so kind and curious and wanted to know everything about me. Seeing that someone really cared that I was there and was interested in what I was doing was a really good feeling. So for a bad Saturday, that evening made up for it a little bit.

Today has been better than the past few days. We had language training in Chosica and had different ¨tasks¨ that we had to complete, and the activity went pretty well. I´m feeling pretty comfortable with approaching strangers and asking them for help now. We also learned today that we are to form ¨youth groups¨ in our community and we are supposed to have activities with them 3-5 times over the next 8 weeks. Each activity is to fall under one of the 3 goals we have as YD Volunteers: healthy lifestyle, preparing them for the world of work, and helping youth become community leaders. Ir´s going to be tough rounding up the kids in my neighborhood because I don´t really haaaave a neighborhood, but I´m ready for the challenge. I think this is really going to help me prepare to go to site, so I´m fairly excited about it (even though I KNOW they will be making fun of my Spanish abilities).

I´m slowly learning that this really is ¨The toughest job you´ll ever love.¨ Times have been and will continue to be hard, but there will be those little success that make me realize why I´m here. The Pervians say it best, ¨poco a poco,¨ which means ¨little by little.¨ My Spanish will improve little by little. I will adjust little by little. I will make progress in my community little by little.

I´ve received some letters (thanks Mom, Nana, and Jess!), and you have no idea how great it is to see your name on one of those envelopes! It instantly turns a bad day around, at least for a little bit! So, thanks to those of you who have been thinking about me, and know that I´m thinking about you, too! One of my goals is to figure out this whole Peruvian post office thing so I can send some letters back your way!

Love and more love.

The First Days

I´m at a internet cafe right now in the village where I´m staying. Everything is going pretty okay. I learned today that I am in the language group Intermediate-Mid, which is actually the level we have to reach after training in order to qualify to become a Volunteer. My host family is really nice and I have two little sisters and one little brother, which makes things a little easier because I can just play with them and they teach me words. Although I´m nowhere near where I want to be with my Spanish skills, I´m realizing that I can actually get by with what I know. And everyday I feel more confident, even though I continue to say things incorrectly. But it´s better to say something that´s wrong than say nothing at all. At least then my host family can correct me. They have had 5 or so Volunteers stay with them in the past so they have an idea of what to expect from Americans and are very patient with me. I think I´m really going to like them- actually, I already do. Training is long. We meet at the Training Center, which is about a half hour´s walk from my house, every morning at 8, and we have classes of different sorts until 5pm, then we walk home. After Training my brain is fried, so the last thing I want to do is go home and speak only in Spanish, but Í have to or I won´t learn anything and it is considered rude to be in your room the whole time. So, about my host family. My mom is Señora Alena, and her husband is El Señor. I can´t remember his name, whoops. They have many children who are grown and have kids, and they all live close by, one family even lives in the upstairs of our house. One of my parent´s daughters died a few years ago so they now take care of her children, Amir, 8, and Alysa, 5. Their cousin, Kenia, 9, is also at our house all the time because her parents work strange hours. My dad teaches at a local school, and  I think my mom works at a school as well, but I´m not too sure about that.

 

The food... well, I´m eating a lot of rice and a lot of potatoes. I also get chicken, eggs, and some fruit. The food is all tasty, but I can already tell you that I will be tired of rice and potatoes within a week! Guess it´s something I have to get used to! I haven´t had any stomach problems yet, cross your fingers that I won´t. But the medical staff here assures us that every single one of us will have diarrhea a LOT, and that 99% of us will poop our pants at some point. That seems to be all they talk about, haha! >They keep telling us that we will all openly be talking about bodily functions within the week... We actually have a pool going, and the last person to poop in their pants or the person who doesn´t do it at all wins the pot. Each of us put in 2 soles, so it´s a pretty hefty pot! Here´s hoping I don´t poop in my pants!!

 

I haven´t had a breakdown yet, so thank goodness for that. This transition seems to be much easier than the one I had in Spain. The PC staff are taking good care of us and help us with whatever questions or concerns we have. I know hard times are to come, but for now I´m feeling pretty alright. My main concern is my Spanish, obviously, and the COLD SHOWERS. I have come to the conclusion that I will not be completely clean for my entire stay in Peru. The water is so cold that it´s physically impossible to stay in the shower longer than 3 minutes. I have learned to wash one limb at a time, and as fast as possible. I will say this though, the cold water is definitely a good way to wake up in the morning!

 

Peru is the most beautiful country I have ever been in. Everything is so pretty. There area I´m in right now is nestled in the mountains and it only rains 2 or 3 times a year, yet everything is green and thriving. I can´t get over the view from my patio. There is a huge rushing river right outside my patio and it´s breathtaking, especially with the mountains in the background. The training center is best described as a jungle oasis. It´s absolutely beautiful. I will take some pictures and put them on here when I can.

OH! If you just so happen to want to send me care packages, DO NOT SEND A BOX! The box will go through customs and most likely end up costing me lots of money to actually receive it. A padded envelope is best. :)

Well, my time is limited so I need to go. Miss you all, love you even more.

Adios!

Well, this is my last night in Kansas before I head out to D.C. for staging.  I leave tomorrow, Wednesday June 8th at 2:45pm and arrive in D.C. at 9:00pm their time. Staging starts on Thursday at noon. Staging is basically a day long orientation about the Peace Corps and what to expect of your service. This is when I fill out all the last minute paperwork and meet all of the other volunteers. I hope to be able to lean on my fellow volunteers for support and guidance in the coming days, as we will all be going through the same emotional roller coaster. Then on Friday, it's off to Peru! Our flight leaves from Washington Reagan at 12:55pm and arrives in Peru at 9:05pm.

It's hard to believe that tomorrow is the day. When I began applying for the Peace Corps back in August I had no idea that less than a year later my dream would actually come true. If you've seen me in the last few days, I'm sure it's pretty obvious that I am constantly doubting my decision to join the Peace Corps and be so far away for such a long time. It's true- I am doubting it. What did I get myself into? Is this what I really want? Although these past couple weeks have been some of the most emotionally taxing of my life, I know that I am doing what I'm supposed to. God chose this path for me and I intend to follow it. Don't get me wrong, I've never been more scared about anything in my life. Take how I felt before leaving for Spain, and multiply it by about 1,000. I'm anxious, nervous, excited, scared... all at the same time.  I can hardly wait to meet the other Volunteers, be in Peru, meet my host family, and figure out just what it is that I'll be doing for the next 2 years. But, I have a lot of apprehensions, too:
Will my Spanish skills be enough?
Will my host family like me?
Will I make any friends?
Who will my support system be?
Are you guys going to forget about me?
Will I be too homesick to be a productive Volunteer?
Am I going to be able to function outside of my comfort zone?

I know my first few days and weeks in Peru are going to be incredibly difficult. There will be times when I hate it and I want to come home. There will be nights when I cry myself to sleep. And I will constantly be questioning my commitment. But I also know that there will be moments when I look up and realize that I'm in PERU and I'm fulfilling one of my dreams. It's then that I will realize that I am doing something that will actually make a difference in somebody's life, including my own. And those moments, no matter how few and far between, are the exact reason that I decided to join the Peace Corps in the first place. THAT is what is getting me through all these different emotions.

Enough of the emotional stuff. I'm going to include a list of everything that I packed, down to the last bobby pin. I found it useful to refer to other Volunteers' packing lists so I hope this will be beneficial to any other future Volunteers!
I am checking one rolling duffle and one rolling suitcase, with a combined weight of about 85lbs. I am carrying on my backpack.
Packing List:
Tennis shoes
TOMS shoes
Reefs flip flops
Tevas hiking sandals
Jeep closed toe walking/working shoes
Black flats
Red canvas slides
Slip-on slippers (of course they're slip on- they're slippers)
6 pairs of socks
15 pairs of undies
7 sports bras
2 underwire bras
5 tank tops
6 solid color everyday wear shirts
3 dressy blouses
4 sweaters
1 black cardigan
1 hoodie
1 fleece jacket
1 rain coat
2 light weight zip-up jackets
3 dresses
2 skirts
1 pair gauchos
1 one-piece swim suit
3 pairs of jeans
2 capri sweatpants
1 bermuda sweatpant
1 full-length sweatpant
5 athletic shorts
1 casual short
1 pair leggings
4 t-shirts
1 pair slacks
2 pairs boxers
2 pajama pants (one light weight, one flannel)
1 large sleeping shirt
1 small fleeve blanket
1 stuffed animal (PJ)
1 small bottle each of shampoo and conditioner
1 bottle face wash
2 bottles sunscreen
1 can bug spray
1 jar face moisturizer
1 bottle lotion
3 razors
10 things of floss
3 toothbrushes
1 tube mascara
1 eyeliner
1 eye shadow
1 liquid foundation
1 pressed powder
1 bronzer
Approximately 20 tubes chapstick (I'm addicted)
3 bottles nail polish and remover
Q-tips
Make-up remover towelettes
Hand wipes
3 month supply of prescription
2 headbands
Tons of hairties and bobby pins
4 bars soap
1 loofah
1 jar mousse for hair
2 jars Jif Reduced Fat Peanut Butter
Ibuprofen
General medicines
250 tampons (they're more expensive in Peru)
3 sticks deoderant
1 jar vaseline (in case I run out of chapstick) ha
Batteries
Wind-up flashlight
Ipod and small speakers
Nook and charger
Digital Camera and charger
Laptop and charger

I know that I overpacked, but I can't help it! Packing for 2 years is harder than one might think. Also, I'm sure I left something out.


Now that that's taken care of, I can successfully end this post. But before I do that let me say one last thing: I've realized that I care about too many people in my life for me to be able to say goodbye so many times. I've tried saying goodbye to everyone I love for the past few weeks, and I just don't like it. Goodbyes are too final, too sad. So, instead of goodbye, I'm saying "see ya later!" See ya in 27 months! I already miss each one of you and love you even more!

P.S. I definitely wouldn't be mad if you all sent me letters and emails ;)