Bittersweet Blessings

In the spirit of Thanksgiving, I have decided to portray a typical Thanksgiving meal in my family.

Lunch starts promptly at 1, which means Tim and Karen arrive at about noon, followed shortly by Nana, ice in tow.  Everyone else is there by 12:30 with their contribution to the meal.  Of course, Mike shows up late with the rolls, and we have to wait to heat them up before we can begin.  Fiiiiinally everything is piping hot and ready to be devoured.  Every single person’s mouth is watering and no one can wait another second to start diggin’ in.  But wait, we haven’t said grace yet.  Everyone bows their heads and waits for me to speak.  I give a beautiful and eloquent (this may not be true, but it’s MY story, so I can say whatever I want!) thanks to our Father for all He has given us, and in unison everyone says “Amen!”

Let the feasting begin!  Tim and Karen are at the front of the line, filling up their plates with delicious goodness.  Grandma, Grandpa, and Nana are right behind them.  Of course we all had to practically push them to the front of the line.  You’d think that they would just accept the fact that we’re going to make them go first after the same repeated performance year after year; but you know them, just as stubborn as every single one of their children and grandchildren.  After the first five people, everyone else is fair game.  Of course, we should let the aunts and uncles go first, but somehow us cousins always end up near the front of the line.  I don’t know how it happens, it’s just does; year after year. 

Now, let me paint you a picture of the spread.  We have turkey, ham, party potatoes, cream cheese corn, green beans with bacon, stuffing, rolls, mashed potatoes with gravy, cranberry sauce that nobody eats, sweet potatoes, Spinach salad, and I’m sure the list goes on.  Then for dessert there are at least 5 of these different options: pumpkin pie, apple pie, pumpkin rolls, pecan pie, chocolate mousse pie, sugar-free strawberry pie, cookies, brownies, key-lime pie, pretzel salad, cheesecake, and whatever other culinary confection you can think of.

So now everyone has their plates heaping with delicious Thanksgiving food.  You’d think that the noise level would be at a minimum because everyone is piling food in their mouths, but that’s just not the case.  Somehow everyone manages to eat and talk at the same time.  And not just talk, but yell.  No matter what table you’re at you can hear Mike’s story or any one of the Hanna cackles bellowing through the house.  Some people might think that this is entirely too much noise for a family gathering, but not me.  Nope, that noise is like music to my ears.  It doesn’t matter if I can’t get in a word edge wise, I could listen to the sound of my family together for hours on end.  There’s something melodic about the mixture of cackles, utensils clattering, talking over one another, and the general happiness floating through the air.  Yes, I would give anything to be able to hear that sound.

Once everyone has finished with seconds, thirds, and fourths, clean-up begins.  I don’t know how we do it, but us cousins never end up helping with the clean-up.  We simply take our plates to the kitchen, throw ‘em in the sink, and retreat  to the backroom where we watch Youtube videos and try to keep Bentley out when they’re inappropriate for children’s ears.  So while we’re all glued to the computer, my mom and her sisters are busy in the kitchen, cleaning up and preparing for the next course.  Once they’ve finished slaving away, everyone finds their way back to the kitchen just in time for dessert.  By this point everyone is miserably full, but you know what they say; there’s always room for dessert!  So we plunge past the pain and put even more delicious food in our bodies.  You’ll hear these words coming from any given mouth, “I’m so full. But it’s soooo good. Hey, pass me another slice of that pie!”

After we’ve all successfully made ourselves sick, things start to quiet down a bit.   You’ll find Mike laying down anywhere he can get horizontal, the guys watching the game in the backroom, and the women gossiping in the kitchen or the living room.  A few people might head upstairs to take a much-needed nap.  That leaves me, wandering from room to room.  I’ll watch TV with the boys for a while, but since I don’t care much for football I never last long in there.  Then I’ll head to the dining room to hang out with the grandparents for a little bit.  After a short time here, I’ll find my way to the living room with all the aunts.  I never really know who or what they’re talking about, but I sit and listen anyway.  Then I start the whole process over again.  I could spend all day, just walking from room to room, listening to the people in my family enjoy being together.

Now is the time when people slowly start dispersing, heading to other family Thanksgivings for another meal, or heading home to unwind from the day.  By this point I’m incredibly tired and ready for a nap, but I love having everyone together; hence why this is always bittersweet for me.  I don’t want anyone to go home, but I can hardly keep my eyes open.  But, this part of the day is inevitable, so everyone starts hugging one another and we all end up in our respective homes. 

When I think about a typical Thanksgiving meal in my family, I can’t help but feel incredibly blessed.  Blessed because we have the opportunity and the means to share an incredibly delicious meal; blessed because we are all able to be together; blessed because my family is so close and loving.  This may sound cliché, but I really think I am the luckiest girl on the planet.  My family is so comfortable together that we can talk about anything.  We genuinely enjoy spending time together.  We love each other.  We all have a roof over our heads and food on our plates.  We have everything we could ever want.

Being in Perú, away from my family on my favorite holiday, is incredibly difficult.  I would give anything to be able to be a part of the madness that I know will ensue.  I would give my left pinky toe to be able to hug all of my cousins, aunts and uncles, grandparents, parents, and brothers.  As I’m eating rice and chicken, I will pretend that it is cream cheese corn and mashed potatoes.  I want nothing more than to spend this day with the people that mean the world to me. 

Although I hate missing this holiday and not being with my family, I realize how incredibly lucky I am to be doing what I’m doing.  I’m in PERU!  I’m learning a new language.  I’m meeting new people; experiencing a new culture.  I’m doing something that less than 1% of the US population has the opportunity to do.  So although this holiday, and every other holiday, is going to be hard for me, I must remember that I have a LOT to be thankful for.

“We can only be said to be alive in those moments when our hearts are conscious of our treasures.”
                   --Thornton Wilder

Encouraging Words

Long time no update.  My sincerest apologies.  I don’t know if I haven’t written because I’ve been too busy or because I haven’t been busy enough.  I’ll give you all a quick update on my life here in Peru.

I’m still teaching English classes, but I’m starting to get a little burnt out.  I definitely don’t want to do this the entire two years.  I think I’ll finish out the school year, which ends December 12, and then call it quits for English.  Of course, I may change my mind in the future or decide to have a class for adults, but for now I’m spent on that subject.  I’ve been trying to keep busy working on my community diagnostic.  Ok, that was a blatant lie.  I barely just started working on it and it has to be done in a couple weeks :-/  I’m not too worried about it though; I think I have a good idea about what I want to write and I have the easy introductory stuff done already.  I just met with a group of youth and they’re going to help me with one aspect of it.  I have to hand out at least 70 surveys to the youth in my town and I was dreading completing this task alone- 70 is a daunting number.  But I spoke with my socios and they helped my organize a group to help me, and between all of us we each have to give 5 surveys.  Five is definitely a more doable number for me!  So with the surveys, information I’ve collected from the Health Post and the Municipality, and random conversations I’ve had with townspeople, I think I’ll be able to crank this diagnostic out in no time flat. 

What, you ask, is a community diagnostic?  Well, I’d love to tell you.  Every Peace Corps Volunteer has to complete a diagnostic during their first three months at site.  Each volunteer is to use the first three months to ask questions, gather information, and form a basic understanding of the site in which he or she is living.  The diagnostic includes many topics such as:  an introduction to the Peace Corps and its history in Peru; information about your program and its goals (in my case, Youth Development); the methods used in order to obtain the information (surveys, interviews, different tools); a description of the community (location, demographics, family structure, history, social indicators such as health and economy, youth issues, social activities, local organizations, community leaders, and local government); data that is directly relevant to youth development; and finally an analysis of the information gathered and possible action that can be taken to better the community.  The diagnostic will include charts, graphs, tables, maps, and samples of the surveys given. 

It sounds like a lot of busy work (and, really, it is), but there is also a purpose to the community diagnostic.  With the information collected, each volunteer should have a better understanding of the community and be able to come up with different ideas and projects to assist in his or her program area. 

Besides procrastinating on the community diagnostic, I haven’t been doing too much.  I had a bit of a mental breakdown last week and I took a few personal days in the capital city to recharge my battery and assess the reasons why I’m here.  After that much-needed mini-vacation I’m feeling refreshed and ready to go!  I’ve been talking with my socios a lot and have a couple different ideas for small projects to start.  I decided that I wanted to make myself available in the library a couple nights a week to help the kids with their homework.  I’ve had countless youth knock on my window asking for help with their math homework.  Since math is the same in every language, I’m actually pretty good at tutoring them.  But since it’s a little awkward to help the kids in my room I’ve decided to make a schedule at the library so they can come to me there.  I hope that in time I’ll be able to pass on the role of tutor to some of the older youth so that it becomes a sustainable program.  I spoke to the mayor about my idea and she was beside herself with excitement to get things started!  She asked if I wanted to start that very same day.  It was definitely encouraging to see her enthusiasm and support.  I’ve also been toying with the idea of starting an exercise class for girls and women at the health post.  I was talking with one of my socios and she brought it to my attention that El Arenal has a gym.  Who would have thought that this tiny little town in Peru actually has a gym?  What a nice surprise that was.  So I talked with the mayor about using the gym and new equipment for a class and she also thought this sounded like a good idea.  This next week I’m supposed to go to the gym to see what kind of equipment it has and see if I can figure out how to run a class with the varied machines.  Hopefully I’ll be able to figure something out because the women in this town could use an hour or two to themselves a couple nights a week.  I’m excited to get the ball rolling on these projects and hopefully start making a little bit of a difference in these kids’ lives!

Thanksgiving is coming up and that thought both excites and saddens me.  I’m excited because a bunch of the volunteers are meeting up in La Libertad for a few days to celebrate; but of course I’m sad because I won’t be at home with my family.  Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday and I know it’s going to be incredibly tough to be away from everyone I love the most in this world.  I’m sad that I won’t be at home, but I’m thankful that I have the opportunity to gather with my new friends and celebrate together.  Bittersweet, ya know?  So our Thanksgiving vacation is Thursday, Friday, and Saturday, and then on Sunday all of us youth volunteers pack up again and head to Lambayeque for Early In-Service training for a week.  Everyone is required to be there so it’ll be really nice to have everyone back together again.  The days will be full of different classes and sessions, and we will all give a presentation of our community diagnostics.  I know it’s going to be about “work,” but I can hardly wait to go because I know we’ll still have a good time.

All in all, things here are going pretty well.  I’m definitely learning what it means to experience my highest highs and my lowest lows all at the same time.  Thank you guys for your continued support and encouragement throughout this entire time.  You guys really are the best.  Love, love, love.

“Venturing out of your comfort zone may be dangerous, yet you do it anyway because our ability to grow is directly proportionate to an ability to entertain the uncomfortable.”